Gorilla Shooting: Mums on Mars Comments

There's been a lot of cafuffle over this incident. We aim to present a fair argument, with views from each side.

Questions To Consider...

1.  Why was the zoo not held responsible for ensuring their barriers were child-proof?
2.  Incidents similar to this have been seen in the news - why is this a recurring theme?
3.  Where were staff at the time of the incident? Why was there no crowd  control?
4.  If animal rights activists and campaigners are in the right, why did zoo officials shoot dead an animal that had been in their care for years?
5. What are the benefits of taking children to zoos where dangerous animals reside? Do these benefits outweigh the obvious risks posed to small children?

Alternate scenarios 

• Child could have been killed if guns not used
• If the gorilla was tranquilised, the time child is in danger is prolonged

Key Points
- Even if parents had been more watchful of child, it's only a matter of time before an incident like this would happen with low level security
- No caring parent would knowingly allow their child to stumble into a life-threatening scenario 
  

Our Views 

The fault is not entirely the parents': In our personal opinion, whilst it is true that parents need to closely monitor their children, it is the fault of the zoo that the child was put in danger in the first place - had there been sufficient barriers, this accident would not have happened at all. That said, there is a huge risk posed to small children who visit wildlife parks, safaris and zoos and there is always the potential for accidents like this to happen. All parents and carers need to be prepared when taking out unruly children who are more likely to wander off.

The action taken was justified: Whilst in an ideal world a tranquiliser gun would have been used, it is simply not realistic - animal experts stated this could have provoked the gorilla, heightening the risk to the child. Although the gorilla was an innocent creature, the first priority of zookeepers is the protection of their customers - the public. If this situation had been left any longer, the child could have easily been killed and the zoo shut down. This is a great loss to both parties and there is never a best outcome for each side. In short, the gorilla would have sparked more outrage if the child was killed, after which point the animal would have to be euthanised anyway!

The zoo should be taking the blame: It is not the fault of the parents, or the public, or the child's that the barriers were not made sufficiently enough to prevent serious injury to a very small child - who is arguably more at risk than an adult. Children cannot make informed decisions for themselves, which is why no one has blamed the child. Both the gorilla and the child were innocent parties. The zoo have the responsibility to look after their animals and ensure their safety as well as the public's. This means that they should not be running a profitable business without first ensuring that the zoo is appropriate for all members of the public to visit. Enclosure proofing is one of the basic requirements of any exhibit and we strongly feel that the zoo has not met the most basic of standards. 

We have created the danger: Taking animals out of their natural habitat is risky and the results cannot be guaranteed. Should such sites as zoos be made available to the public if incidents like this are continually occurring? It is not natural for a silverback gorilla to be engaging with the public in Cincinnatee, just as it would not be natural for a human to reside in the gorilla's natural habitat of the forests in central Africa.

Hot Topic of the Day: Gorilla Shooting (Source: The Mirror/ BBC News)

There is outrage on social media at the shooting of Silverback Gorilla, after a 4 year old boy fell into his enclosure. This incident occurred on the 29th May 2016 in Cincinnati zoo, USA .

(Image Source: The Mirror)

Witnesses claim to have heard the boy stating he 'wanted to go into the enclosure' and was seen attempting to breach the barriers moments before the incident occurred.

After crawling through the barriers, the boy fell 12 feet into the moat area, and was grabbed by the 17 year old gorilla known as 'Harambe' (weighing in at 400lb/180kg).

Amateur footage shot by onlookers shows the gorilla dragging the boy through shallow water across the enclosure. Others argue that the gorilla was not trying to hurt the boy, but in fact protect him from the perceived threat of screaming witnesses. Jerry Stones, the 74 year old man who raised Harambe from birth, describes him as a "gentle giant".

It has been reported that a full 10 minutes passed before action was taken by the zoo, shooting the animal dead. 

The public question why a tranquiliser gun was not used, though officials say that this method would not have been appropriate as it can take up to 10 minutes for the sedative to have effect, and could have provoked aggressive behaviour in the gorilla, increasing the danger of the situation.

The 4 year old went to hospital with concussion and bruises, but no broken bones.

'The parents are to blame'...

Deonne Dickerson and Michelle Gregg - Parents of the boy

Public writers on social media are blaming the parents for the unfortunate incident.

Michelle Gregg, mother of the boy, responds to criticism on social media, with claims that she should have been keeping a closer eye on her child.

"As a society we are quick to judge how a parent could take their eyes off of their child and if anyone knows me I keep a tight watch on my kids. Accidents happen but I am thankful that the right people were in the right place today." 

Over 70,000 petitioners have signed the campaign on Change.org, requesting an investigation of the parents' negligence. 

Sources
All images are sourced from the links below. The authors claim no right over these images.
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/eyewitness-says-seeing-gorilla-shot-8081827
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/astonishing-new-footage-shows-gorilla-8082168
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-36407643

My Zen Space: Sleep Hygiene

Sleep hygiene is defined as habits and routines which encourage good quality sleep and promotes higher alertness when awake. Here are some helpful tips which should send you to the land of nod peacefully, and regularly:
 
Do...

+ Go to the toilet a couple of times before going to sleep - restful night without trips to the bathroom
+ Read a book, but not one that is too exciting as it can just keep you up
+ Resolve any issues with your partner, or agree to sort it out the next day so you don't go to bed with things weighing on your mind
+ A book about dream definitions can help make sense of the oddities in dreams
+ Notepad next to the bed - write down any worries
+ Use worry dolls - tell them your worries and put them back 1 by 1 into their box or bag
+ Have a cuddle with your partner, child or pet
+ Watch a relaxing program
+ Count to 500 - every time you make a 
mistake start over and when 500 is reached get up and do something
+ If you're struggling to relax, do something fairly active (but quiet!) to make yourself tired
+ Dim the lights before bed - use lamps instead of overhead lights
+ Develop a routine - going to bed and waking up at the same time each day (or most days)
+ When you wake up, get out of bed as soon as possible 
+ Make the room as dark as it can be 

Don't... 
 
- Watch TV closer than an hour to bedtime - the light from the screen tricks our brains into thinking it is daytime
- Do too much before bed - adrenaline from exercise can keep you awake
- Drink tea/coffee or eat dark chocolate right before bed as they have high caffeine contents 
- Drink too much water before bed
- Use a laptop in bed, eat in bed etc. - use only for sleep and sex
- Get into bed again once you have got up 
- Try to force yourself to sleep - read or do something if you can't relax
- Eat heavy meals - this is harder on the digestive system
- Mull over what you have to do the next day 

Get Out In The Garden

Budgeting

• Ask friends for help doing up the garden - extra manpower makes it all a lot faster
• Buy seeds instead of full grown plants
• Upcycle stones, sticks, rubble and concrete to create stylish eye-catching designs
• DIY is the way to go, get online for hints, tips and tutorials
• Keep a saving jar especially for doing up the garden
• See if anyone you know has unwanted items you can use such as garden chairs, watering cans, fencing and flower pots. Even bricks can be used to create a border or raised bed

Making the Most of Your Space

• If you don't have a garden, use hanging baskets on balconies and keep small herbs on windowsills
• Look out for handy corners - transform a graveled corner into a flower patch
• Build or buy a trellis to encourage plants to grow up instead of out, leaving you with more overall space
• Stick to borders - fence them off or line with stones and trim plants to within this border so lawn is kept neat and open

Upcycling

• Use concrete slabs to create a makeshift rockery
• If relocating slabs or stepping stones, save the grass dug up from the new location to cover the old space
• Old plant pots can be painted for a new look
• Try different coloured plant pots for added colour
• Use large stones found in the garden to create borders
• Sticks can make a great home made fence, which looks natural (garden wire or string holds them together)

Plants - Sourcing

• Try to find out if plants are native - aliens will not support local wildlife and may prevent native species from flourishing. An example of this is the yellow flowers in Hawaii, they were introduced and now take over one of the parks near the Volcano.
• Affordable plants can be found at yard sales, but make sure they are healthy and ask for growing advice. Make a note of the species and how large it will grow.
• Look out for offers and plant sales - buying late in the season is usually cheaper
• Ask for cuttings from friends and family - with care, can work well and is free!
• Allow wild plants to thrive - blackberry plants are an easy source of fresh fruit but have to be well-maintained as they easily overgrow
• Buying seeds or seedlings is almost always cheaper than pre-potted or more mature plants

What to Keep in Pots and The Overgrowing Beasts of the Garden

Always check the label for planting instructions; some plants are not suitable for use in containers and others require fertilizers and plant food.

In Pots: Herbs such as mint and sage - can grow massive if not cut back
Beasts of the Garden: Buddlea (butterfly bush) Blackberry, Raspberry, Strawberry, Heather, Evergreen trees, Bamboo, Lavender

Recycling And Saving Water

• If you have a paddling pool and want to empty it, gather the water in watering cans and use it on plants.
• Use the dirty washing up water on the garden (use eco-friendly washing liquid though) This also helps keep the sink clear from blockages.
• Hanging baskets - water until dripping from the bottom and place plant pots underneath
• Get a water butt
• Use dishes under plant pots to save water 
• To keep the ground moist, plant heather or allow plants to grow in close proximity, creating shade and not allowing ground to dry out
• Pour last night's glass of water on the garden instead of down the sink
• Don't use small plant pots - they dry out quickly
• Place stones on the topsoil of plant pots, this helps keep moisture in 

Leftover Menu: Bacon Surprise

Great if you don't want the full fried breakfast, but are craving those key ingredients - bacon, potato, tomatoes and onions.
 
About 40 minutes to create

Ingredients: 
Olive or Sunflower Oil
4 rashers of Bacon
1 large Potato
a handful of Cherry Tomatoes
1/4 Onion
Side salad (optional)

You Will Need:
Frying pan
Chopping board
Food scissors
Sharp knife

Recipe:

1.  Chop potato into small slices (the smaller, the faster they will cook)
2.  Heat oil in a frying pan, until a flick of water sizzles
3.  When the oil is hot, place potato slices in frying pan
4.  Whilst the potato is cooking, cut the bacon into strips with food scissors
5.  Chop the tomatoes into quarters and the onion into fine slices
6.  Add the onion and mix occasionally
7.  After about 30 minutes, or when the potato has browned to a golden colour, add the bacon and tomato
8.  Stir often, but allow to simmer (stirring too much prevents efficient cooking)  
9.  Serve with a side-salad, or on it's own

Hot Topic of The Day: Mums - Becoming Invisible (Source: TODAY Parenting Team)

'A few days ago, I was walking downtown. A man walked toward me, his face stubbled, his soiled hands clutching plastic shopping bags. An oversized jacket hung loose and undone from his thin frame. As we passed each other, a low voice spoke out. “Nice legs mommy.” ' - Ann Cinzar

The writer talks about how she enjoyed this comment more than she should have, claiming she has hit rock bottom. Personally, I believe that there is nothing wrong with enjoying a compliment, whoever it may be from. I have to admit that my reaction to cat-calls is totally controlled by my mood. On a bad day, I might be tempted to flip off (UK: sticking your middle finger up at) my unwanted admirer, but on a good day, I will have a little giggle to myself, possibly even giving my attention - giver a cheeky smile as I walk off!

That said, it can be incredibly annoying when you're pregnant. Never before in my life has a complete stranger made it their mission to touch my swollen belly, or have my Dad's friends been so interested in invading my personal space to lovingly stroke my ever-growing bump. Thanks to my partner's Mum, I acquired a handy top, saying 'HANDS OFF THE BUMP!'. This is incredibly helpful if you feel as awkward as I did, trying to explain that as much as I was happy with my pregnancy, I simply did not wish to be caressed (thanks very much)!

The advice from the writer's friend was to enjoy the attention from the public, as you become invisible after having your second child. Personally, I won't know if this is true until I (possibly) have another. In the same breath, some of my Mummy friends have told me of this inevitability and warn that personal time is so very precious; not to waste it while I still have it. Although I am currently a Mother of 1, I have faced a similar experience.

During my pregnancy, the amount of attention I received was tenfold the usual, and I never ran out of a conversation topic when it came to my personal pregnancy experiences... Everyone has their views and most are interested in what it was like for me, even if they had no plans to make mini-mes themselves. However, after my little one was brought into this world as her own little person, suddenly I felt invisible. All the focus was switched over to this little miracle, and I felt somewhat ignored. Those 9 months of riding the roller-coaster of emotions (a result of the hormones coursing through my body) felt irrelevant. 

Everyone did congratulate me, I have to say, but this little thing only hours old had stolen my limelight - Look at how well she had done! What a beautiful baby! Wow look at how much hair she has! .... The compliments were endless. Where was my well done, where were my balloons and presents? Her wardrobe was more extensive than my own (so frustrating as mine diminished to only a few items over my pregnancy). 

I am in no way saying that all this attention was not well-deserved. We had to have a growth scan for mini-me, she was so small but healthy and remained tiny at birth, although she was overdue. We were asked 'was she premature' she was that tiny. I am so proud of my little one. She is an incredible character and brings a smile to the most sour face.

But I don't want to become invisible. I don't want to be seen as just 'her Mum'. I'm struggling to remain my own person and avoid the tags that come with motherhood, I don't want to be known as a 'stay at home mum' or a 'housewife'. . . So for me at least, writing this blog is one way to reclaim a fraction of my own life. The freedom that comes with writing is immense, like a weight has been lifted from my heavy shoulders and the spark in my eyes and the fire in my sassy comments is back.

What makes you feel like your own person, as More than a Mum? Let us know and we promise we'll do our best to get back to you.

XOX 
Mums on Mars 

Sources:
http://community.today.com/parentingteam/post/do-you-become-invisible-when-youre-a-mom

Jo Frost: The 3 B's (Bath, Book and Bed)

I heard that Jo Frost was trying to tell parents that the three B's will always get your child in bed. I know that she's trained and I know that she's helped a lot of families but when it comes to bedtime routine she doesn't really have to deal with getting kids to bed every night.  I know this method doesn't overly work for my family and this my reasoning behind it.

Let's start with the first one - Bath:
As a Mother that has a child with eczema, having a bath everyday only exacerbates her eczema. I got told by a doctor that bathing you're child too much can lead to flare ups. Having a bath every day will not work for my daughter. And if you have quite a hyperactive child that doesn't work either because they just get really, well, hyper.

The Second Step - Book:
I love the idea of reading a book before bed but for certain children it just wakes them up again. My child won't sit there and listen to me reading a book - not without trying to distract me or telling me he suddenly wants a different book. I guess this could be just my child, but there must be other children like him.

Last But Not Least, The Finale - Bed:

Okay, if the first two don't work how do you do the third!?

I personally think the best way to get my children to sleep is not to do the things that this Nanny has told me works, but things that I have tried with my own children.

After it gets to a certain time - normally about 6 - I start to make it darker around the home, so it mimics the sunset. (Turning off lights, making the TV quieter and switching off music creates a calmer atmosphere.) I do not let my children eat after this time, because I personally believe it keeps them awake. I limit what they're watching if I choose to let them watch TV. I sit down and relax with them and do not rush around.

We all get into our PJs and brush our teeth. Around about 6:30 we will be upstairs, lying on my bed. At about 6:45 I will lay them down in their beds, and sit in their room until I fall asleep. My kids normally fall asleep at 7 o'clock. This method has worked for me for a long time and I recommend it.

Dealing With a Cold

Being a parent and on my own most of the time, I would say that having cold or flu symptoms can make looking after your children nearly impossible. Here are my tips for dealing with cold to get you through the day.

The first thing I will do is to start the day with a nice hot bath or shower, if I didn't have time to do this I would fill the sink with hot water, putting my head over the sink and will placing a towel on top of my head so all the steam stays in. (if I just have a headache I will get a nice hot flannel and put it on my forehead).

When it's time to get dressed and ready for the day, warm clothes make me nice and toasty. Then I'm like 'Let's get downstairs and make some breakfast'; the kids are up at this point and I will have to make their breakfast as well. I like to start with a nice hot lemon water drink, it helps with the congestion and soothes my throat. (I do not drink coffee or tea because I don't feel like it helps at all and it can make me feel worse.)

For my breakfast I try to eat a lot of fruit with my toast, then I will take my vitamins (normally vitamin C and zinc).

I will try to do a little bit of yoga but it doesn't always fit it in with my busy schedule. It's helpful though, as it relaxes my muscles and helps me get ready for my day by reducing anxiety.

Attracting Wildlife To Your Garden

• Grow wild flowers
• Use butterfly-attracting plants such as buddleia
• Keep a wild patch - allow 'weeds' such as stinging nettles to grow (some butterflies lay their eggs on these)
• Have a compost heap
• Stay away from pesticides
• Put out bird food and a birdbath
• Have a log pile
• Leave out tit-bits for the birds (but not overnight, can attract rats)
• Have a small pond
• Let grass on the boarders grow a little longer - encourages insects
• Grow fruit and veggies
• Keep ontop of watering the plants
• Try to have as many native plant species as possible
• A sheet of metal laid down attracts lizards and snakes
• Allow trees to grow tall
• Deter cats

Dad Away - Dealing With The Kids On Your Own

The person that's meant to be there for you and help you when things get hard; I guess people could say he's only a phone call away, but it's not the same. He's not here when I'm ill and my head is banging, my ears are ringing and my body is aching. I just want him to take the load but yeah I'm still running at 100 miles per hour and feel like I'm sinking.

Mouths need food, the house needs to be cleaned, and again it's down to me. Feeling like I'm the only one who cares about the babies that we have both brought into the world. I'm that single mother that I never wanted to become, just because I chose to be with their dad who sees them monthly. This is a sacrifice I willingly made, that will never be appreciated - because to him I sit on my backside all day doing nothing. He thinks that looking after our two is the easiest job in the world.

Through my children's eyes nothing is wrong; they don't understand that when their dad leaves he leaves me as just the one parent at home. When he visits, it's like he teases them and mocks them: 'this is what you could have'. Would it be easier if they don't see him at all, would it be selfish on my part? I'm sorry that I'm going to have to see their tears when he leaves. I do everything but I only see what he does and thank him to Remember Me. I feel like it's not fair - why can't I be the fun parent?

Dear children;  I carried you in my womb, I looked after you when you were born. I deal with your changing moods, your cries, I cuddle you when you're sad and tell you there's nothing to be scared of when you say there's a monster under your bed. I'm up all hours with you, making sure you're alright before I go to sleep. I put your needs above mine. Then you turn round and say "I miss Daddy". You thank him for stuff that I do everyday. Am I just not good enough and he is just simply better!? I tried children. 

I try every day to be the best parent I can be, but in my mind your dad will always top my efforts.

Breast Vs Bottle

Breast Feeding

Pros

• Great bonding with your child when breastfeeding (skin to skin contact)
• As it's very intimate this helps bonding also
• Easy to latch on with practice
• Can go out with having to make up bottles (one less thing for the changing bag)
• Never run out off milk
• 'Breast is Best' the media loves to guilt-trip us into breast feeding as it really can contain more nutrients and is, after all, the most natural way
• Benefits the body - love hormones and helping recovery of the body after birth (encourages pelvic floor to contract back together we believe)

Cons

• Hard to weening them off after a year
• Don't get a break from feeds because babies are held when they are fed 
• The only release is to pump milk, which can further stimulate milk production
• Risk of mastitis
• Feeding is frequent (it is impossible to rest or do household tasks to satisfaction)
• Not all babies latch well and can be tongue-tied
• Embarrassment and reluctance to feed in public 
• Partner may not be supportive/ can spark jealousy as breasts are no longer 'his'

Mums on Mars: Pros & Cons - Breast

Pros
- Unique bond no one else has
- Both baby and mother working together (you both learn the technique together)
- Gives a use to otherwise unused boobs!
- De-sexualises the breast
- Can increase awareness of nature's intended use for breasts - just as other animals feed their young it is natural and normal

Cons
- Painful stomach aches whilst feeding as stomach muscles contract back together (or something like that - everything moves back and this f***ing hurts!) 
- It's hard for anyone else to take over as expressing takes so long and your baby might be apprehensive about others feeding her
- Can be painful at first and takes a lot of practice
- My daughter would not take a bottle
- Not just anyone could take her out with pumped milk as even then she still refused it


Bottle Feeding

Pros

• Less leakages (breast-wise)
• Can be bought ready-made in most supermarkets
• Choice of formula
• Does not affect the woman's body 
• Means any required medication can be taken safely by mother
• Other half can take over feeding duties
• More freedom as hands free (one-handed technique can be developed!)
• Can be easier for baby to latch if breast is not accepted 
• Can still be intimate (holding hand, stroking face and hair)

Cons

• Constant washing-up and sterilising
• Anyone can feed - may decrease personal bond or result in others being over-bearing (wanting to take over duties)
• Fining a balance between partner feeding and mother feeding duties
• Must remember bottle warmers and other kit for outings
• More messy - can spill
• Remembering the correct scoops
• Water has to be boiled before using for bottles
• Waiting for milk to warm up/cool down
• Does not induce the 'love hormone' the same way breast feeding does

Mums On Mars: Pros & Cons - Bottle 
Pros
- My daughter had to have prescribed formula (lactose free) which would mean she might not have got on with breast anyway 
- More independence for baby - eventually can hold bottle on their own
- Easier to maintain eye-contact whilst feeding as baby at different angle compared to on the breast
 
Cons
- Less intimate
- Personally felt others could take over duties a little too much

Mums: I gave up after only a few days (literally). I had shooting pains down my back, my breasts were so ridiculously engorged that I couldn't wear any kind of bra (they could not be contained: I am usually about a 34 DD, this had swollen to well over 36 F). Every time I pumped I sympathised with dairy cows - the sweet relief was intoxicating and yet my attachment to the pump was loathsome.
            However! The incredible rush of love hormones for my child were amazing - not like any other sensation and it appeared as though we were one entity again, as we had been whilst I was pregnant. The bond experienced is out of this world, but for me the pain was not worth it.
            Eventually I was persuaded by my partner's Mum to switch to the bottle. Since doing so, my daughter slept soundly, waking every few hours and her feeds were like clockwork - rest assured at exactly 11pm she would be awake and ready to chow down! 
            I wish that my experience with breast feeding had been a joyous one, but it's not for everyone and I applaud any mother who has persevered with it.

Mars: I think there is never the right thing to do, as long as your child is fed and happy then that's the main thing. I have breastfeed, have gave my child formula. I think I prefer to breastfeed but that's my honest opinion. But trying to get them off is the hardest.

 

Hot Topic Of The Day - Reconstructions After Mastectomy (Source: Science Daily)

New procedure known as SADIE Flap

(Superficial Inferior Epigastric Artery-Deep Inferior Epigastic Artery Flap)

UT Southwest Medical Center surgeons have come up with a new method of breast reconstruction  which takes advantage of two microsurgical procedures using abdominal tissue and other body tissue.

A flap based procedure usually uses tissue obtained from the abdomen, thigh, buttocks. The new technique incorporates improved and updated versions of pre-existing techniques if the usual flap surgeries (known as DIEP/SIEA) are not appropriate. Blood vessels can be mismatched in more traditional flaps, making the method less reliable. It's reported that with the new approach ''..there is no mismatch of blood vessels, and the flow of blood is not burdened by any turbulence issues'' - Dr. Nicholas Haddock.

Surgeons explain that trying to match arteries can  be compared to attempting to attach two pipes of different sizes; making an ill-fitted seal. This results in an anatomical mismatch and causes turbulence. To solve this issue, the smaller of the arteries ('pipes') must have an intermediary pipe - with one smaller and one larger end. This can prevent debris building up and therefore clogging/clotting in arteries.

This 'intermediate pipe system' addresses this issue of any mismatching arteries from the SIEA flap joining to the chest. Using instruments specially designed for Super-Microsurgery, three procedures have been completed and UTSW surgeons hope to expand the use of this method, as well as increasing the use of the more traditional SIEA flap.

UT Southwest Medical Center is one of the first centres in the world to practice four-flap breast constructions, and their breast microsurgical team has one of the biggest experiences globally with multiple-flap based surgeries using combined parts of the body. In the case of Four-flap breast reconstruction, fat and skin are sourced from the patient's stomach and back of the legs.

To help women make an informed decision about their surgery, UT southwstern's Breast Reconstruction Program works in association with UT Southwestern's Harold C. Simmons Comprehensive Cancer Center. A woman's decision is based on several factors: her health, any  predicted cancer treatments, approximate recovery time, body shape and includes other factors.

This new technique is increasing in national recognition, and is anticipated to grow in popularity.

Source: https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2016/04/160419145411.htm

Schooling - Home vs State/Public

The question I often ask myself is:

If we as parents are making the right decision on the schooling style for our child,why is home schooling disputed so much? Each child is an individual and has their own unique needs.

Home-Schooling 

Pros                                          
- More focus on the individual                
- Possibility of better focus in classes       
- Reduces distractions                           
- No involvement with 'the wrong crowd' 
- Intimate insight into learning for parents
- More relaxing home environment             
- Only as expensive as it is chosen to be  
- Free to dress as the child pleases         
                                                         
Cons
- Uncomfortable with pressure to perform           
- No companions for confidence-building    
- Decreased likelihood of making friends    
- Could result in lack of social skills
- Low independence (not travelling to/from school)    
- Can be overbearing with few teachers
- Boredom from staying at home 
- No school trips
                                                                    
State Schooling (or Public Schooling)                     
  
Pros                                              
- Focus off individuals                             
- Students can help each other in classes         
- Social skills developed                          
- Independence travelling to/from school   
- High friend potential                             
- Helps with organisation and timekeeping    
- Time away from home stresses                
- Uniform ignores fashion trends, making students equals                             
                                                                         

Cons

- Not enough individual attention from teachers
- More distractions from other students  
- Bullying potential, extremely 'cliquey' in schools
- Can have long travel times/distances 
- Involvement with 'the wrong crowd'  
- Up to year between oldest and youngest in yeargroup
- Still homework to do after school 
- Heightened anxiety if uncomfortable with crowds
- Uniform etc must be supplied by parents                                       

Hot Topic Of The Day: 3 Potential Fathers (Source: The Jeremy Kyle Show)

Three potential fathers but I hope my boyfriend's the dad!

Mother: Chloe (missed actual name, so we'll use this) 
Potential Father: Zack
Baby: Jayden

This is an incredibly complex and intimate subject. Please be respectful if you wish to comment.

Chloe
She slept with three different men in the space of three weeks, so it would have been virtually impossible to tell who the biological father is. It stated on the show that Chloe told Zack this fact two weeks after discovering she was pregnant, saying they didn't really know each other at the time. Since then, they have become a couple and it seems are reasonably happy together. It is presumed that Jayden lives together with them as a family. Chloe was incredibly emotional, crying whilst answering that she didn't believe her partner and her son's bond would remain the same if it turned out that he wasn't the father. 

Zack
Zack was the first person to hold Jayden, and he has a 'good bond' with him. He would be thrilled if Jayden is his biological son, but stated that if he isn't, nothing would change and he would continue to be a loving father figure because of his strong bond with Jayden and his love for Chloe.
Results
DNA test results were announced on the show. As it turned out, Zack was not the father. However, this couple appeared to love each other enough to make it work. The devastating effect was evident as both Chloe and Zack were in floods of tears.

Discussion
Now most people would jump to the insulting conclusion 'what a slag!' or use some other derogatory term when learning that a women is not aware of who the father of her child is. In this case, as in all cases (in my opinion) it is not justified to start throwing out names. This isn't necessary and does nothing to help the cause. That said, it is also true that Chloe could have practiced safe sex and maybe she should be a little more cautious who she takes to bed, especially when she admits one case was 'a drunken stand'. Sleeping with a stranger under the influence of alcohol (or any other drug) is incredibly unsafe and can lead to a very sticky situation indeed! (No pun intended!) 

Personally, I believe that after making the decision to continue the pregnancy, this woman did the right thing. Firstly, she confessed to what had happened and secondly, has not hidden this truth - even going on TV with it! Telling one of the potential dads was a great move, but I feel the other two should have also been notified. After all, this situation involves them and from the results it looks like those phone calls urgently need to be made.

It is my hope that Zack will not feel alienated from Jayden as a result of the outcome. From this show I think we should consider how important it is to keep ourselves safe and informed when making life choices. It's so easy to go out clubbing or drinking in bars and bump into someone who wants to take you home. It's not always a good idea to go along with this invitation, though. Would you accept the same offer from a stranger on the bus (however good looking) ?! It is a similar principle, after all everyone is a stranger until we take the time to get to know and trust people.

Johnny Depp Interview on Very Angry Australians

This is so funny. 

I understand that the Australians have their policies. And the fact that they can not like that one movie actor gets away with stuff. But I think it's a little bit overboard. And their crimes are a lot worse then letting a small little doggie into a country. 

The Leach I Made

I have enjoyed my time breastfeeding and the close bond that comes with it, but now my daughter is reaching two I'm starting to find it claustrophobic as she still wants to cling on to me the minute  I wake up. Her hands are down my top, not letting me move and every time I move my hand away she starts to make my feel like I'm hurting  her and that I'm the one in the wrong by feeling this way.

Nobody tells you once you get them on it's nearly impossible to get them off. I have been trying for half a year to stop the little leach, it makes me think 'Should I have even started in the first place?'. I know that this is selfish, I just didn't know having children would take away such freedom on such a personal level.

Grumblings of a Grumpy Dad

Good afternoon. So this blog is new and I have been asked to write something by Mars. Here I add a disclaimer. I do love her and the offspring.

Nonetheless, walking into the hallway, having had a nice peaceful afternoon, to realise the reason for the quite. Toilet roll strewn all across the floor amongst the marble run, the toy I had believed them to be playing with. Now dear son is fast asleep. Probably worn out from the creation of a new world. The towing plastic marble run towers amongst the soft rolling toilet roll plains. Well. All I can think is, He isn't going to sleep tonight.

Living With Dyslexia - Through Dyslexic Eyes.

See the world through a dyslexic eyes, the mess of words my brain cannot make sense of, the white paper shining like the sun swirling words I can't understand. my light-sensitive eyes hurt as gaps getting bigger,  I try to re-read my scrambled words that some how made sense to me before. Laughter that only I can hear, tells me your thoughts will never be  heard on a piece of paper as long as he who named dyslexi1a has got hold of me. I just want to sit down and read a book and see life through somebody else's eyes, but he stops me. No more I say, no more. I will control you, I will control me.

Hot Topic Of The Day: Engagements - How Long Is Too Long? (Source: The Real)

This clip from the real talks about how long is to long be engaged and if the guy is serious about marrying his fiancee or if his just trying to keep her happy.

The show then go on to discuss:
-When he proposes he's entertaining the idea of getting married (some men)
- Proposing to scare of our people way go to tie that woman down
- It's not ready to get married there and then you should not give us a woman a ring
- Giving rings just to get the girls to not say anymore about getting married
- Know when he's ready to get married before he proposes
- If you're a bit unsure say yes to the guy and think about it later because he might not do it again (you could miss out on a good thing)
-getting engaged really young should you have a long engagement


Source:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?
v=9s6WMFgSpKk


Mars: My personal opinion is that I'm one of those girls that would want to be engaged, but not to get married straight away - so the idea of having to get married the minute you're engaged is not appealing to me. 

I feel this is a bit outdated and not modern for the modern world. I get some women would not agree with me but as long as you love each other, why do you need to get married? It was originally a religious ceremony. One day I hope that I will get married but even though I'm engaged I don't think it'll be anytime soon, because once you have kids your priorities move and the money that you could be spending on a wedding you spend with your children. You can look at it as a waste of money for just one day.

Children's Easy Summer Hair-Do

As we all know kids do not sit still to get the hair done and nice easy summer hair do that everybody can do, also it keeps the hair out of kids faces.

You will need;

- comb or a separating comb

- for hair ties

- and Bows or ribbon (optional)

Useful tip you can let your brush or us a spray bottles of damp in the hair.

Split the hair in half and brush the bottom bit it downwards Still holding the top section. Then with the top pieces of hair split in 4. Bubble two of the front section, then with the second of all use the hair that you used in the first.

You can even add little flowers onto the second bands.

Lovely up-do!

My Zen Space: De-Stressing

Think of a flower...

Write it down - keep a notepad and pen nearby for when stress strikes

Keep a stress diary - notice what triggers your stress and write a list of helpful aversions to stress which work for you

Light a candle, incense stick or use potpourri  - this is known as aromatherapy

Have a bath - turn down the lights and focus on the warmth of the bath, easing your muscles

Go out for a walk - getting out of the house gives you a different perspective and offers the opportunity to day dream, taking your mind off your woes

Switch on Some Music - whether it's to release anger or to calm down, this always helps!

Move! - doing exercise releases endorphins, the hormone responsible for the 'feel good' factor. If the gym is not for you, do a few jumping jacks or go up and down the stairs a few times

Clean - doing household chores is another form of exercise and gives you something to focus on

Bake - this uses physical energy (for mixing) and you get a treat at the end! It could also count as aromatherapy...? 

Phone a friend

Type a ranty message - you can use Word and delete it afterwards

Scream into a pillow - it might hurt your throat, but really does take off some of the steam coming out of your ears!

Set a worry time in which you go back to your worries and if they are no longer bothering you, disregard them

Do something you enjoy

Draw - if you're not particularly artsy, just doodle or close your eyes and see what happens. Don't be hard on yourself if it doesn't come out as you wished - this is just an exercise and shouldn't be taken too seriously.

Read a good book

Watch a documentary - movies are great but you really have to focus for documentaries as you are learning. Alternatively, you can tune out ad half-watch one

Take a deep breath

Use visual imagery - think of your favourite object and focus on it (i.e. think of a flower)

Have a back massage or foot rub - Ask your other half (or a close friend)  

Buy a Head Massager - Or, failing this, give yourself a head rub

Partner's Comment: Try to do hobbies you enjoy and make time for yourself. Spend time with your child. Last but not least - have sex! It boosts endorphins.

Hot Topic Of The Day: Diet (Source: Zack FM 105.3)

Looking at Fibre in the Diet


Getting enough fibre and eating the right amount can help keep your weight down. The recommended daily intake is...

Age(years)            Recommended Daily Intake of Fibre (g)
2-5                         15
5-11                       20
11-16                     25
16-18                     30
18+                        30

According to Scientific Advisory Committee on Nutrition,  adults are only getting 18g of fibre a day, just over half the recommended amount.


The Importance of Fibre 

Including enough fibre in your diet reduces health risks such as heart disease and diabetes, as well as lowering chances of developing some cancers. It can also aid digestion, with insoluble fibre benefiting the gut and helping to prevent constipation. (Soluble fibre also helps by making stools softer.)

Don't worry, you won't have to eat loads of brown rice. You can still enjoy a varied diet, by swapping out a chocolate bar and crisps for a piece of fruit - like a pear, trying an exotic food at dinner such as artichoke. Both these foods are surprisingly high in fibre. Or, if you're a bit peckish, make a sandwich with brown bread instead of white. We are fans of Kingsmill 50/50 - perfect if you still prefer white, or don't like grainy brown bread. The flavour of brown bread is pretty strong - try it with soup or cheese!

More Facts and Figures... 


The two types of fibre are categorized as soluble and insoluble. Both are important, offering different benefits to the body.

Soluble Fibre

• Grains: oats, barley and rye
• Fruit: banana, apple (pears - Zac FM)  
• Beans/Pulses: baked beans, chick peas
• Root Veggies: potato, carrot  

Insoluble Fibre

• Cereal
• Wholemeal: bread, pasta and brown rice
• Veggies and potatos with skin left on
• Nuts and seeds    

Some Tips (Source: British Nutrition Foundation) 

• Start your day with high fibre breakfast cereal (bran flakes/porridge)
• Swap white bread for granary bread
• Keep skins on potatoes
• Healthy snacking - nuts, seeds, fruit and veggie sticks (try with houmous?)
• Have rye crackers and oatcakes as an alernative to crisps
• Your 5 a Day - include veggies in sauces, stews, curries or as a side dish with main meals
• Add in pulses to your diet (beans, lentils and chickpeas)     
• Dessert! Fruit salad and canned fruit is delicious with ice cream ;)
• Experiment with dried fruit or new healthy foods such as artichoke  

Sources

Radio: Zack FM 105.3
https://www.nutrition.org.uk/healthyliving/basics/fibre.html
https://www.nutrition.org.uk/attachments/article/872/fibre%20factsheet.pdf